Recently I was given a challenge to write a journal entry as if I were a pet. It was an interesting exercise. I hope you have as much fun reading it as I did writing it!

What an unusual day. I was curled up on the pillow next to my human, Bonnie. We were having a lovely sleep when suddenly she jumped out of bed, startling me out of my slumber. As I stretched, she muttered something about sleeping in and being late. I didn’t understand the problem. It’s quite lovely to lounge around and have her pamper me.

Before I knew it, she was dressed and out the door. I ran after her, crying my displeasure at her abrupt departure. We hadn’t had our morning cuddles. Where was she going?

I padded over to my food dish for breakfast. The dish was empty. This was totally unacceptable. I jumped up on the back of the sofa to look out the window and saw her car disappearing down the street.

After waiting a more than reasonable 2 minutes for Bonnie to come to her senses and return, it became clear that I’d been left to fend for myself.

I went from the kitchen chair to the table looking for food. Nothing there. Maybe I’d have better luck on the kitchen counter. A few kernels of popcorn from last night didn’t interest me. The half filled glass held more promise. My attempt to gently get my head far enough inside to have a drink didn’t go so well. The glass tumbled to the floor and shattered. I was thirsty but not enough to risk broken glass on my delicate paws.

Now I was mad. Bonnie must be taught a lesson. I went back into the bedroom and jumped up onto her dresser. One by one, I swiped my paw at each of her precious trinkets until they lay in disarray and a few extra pieces on the floor.

I felt better but still needed to release more frustration. The cushions in the living room were a perfect spot to see how sharp my claws were. After releasing some stuffing, I was worn out and weak from lack of nourishment. A nap was in order.

Much later I was awoken by Bonnie yelling, “Princess, what have you done?” I turned my back and ignored her. It seems she’s forgotten who’s boss around here. She neglected her duties this morning and I’m the one who deserves an apology. And a can of tuna.