Most of the carrots in our garden grew side by side. Not these two. They grew together, one wrapping itself around the other.
Two distinct tops were visible above the ground. The roots at the bottom were also separately defined.
At some point during their growth, the shapes were altered as they became entwined and no longer individual. The result is you can’t take them apart without breaking at least one.
There have been times I’ve aligned myself closely to another whom I admired. Subtly my individuality disappeared as I attempted to mold myself into the other person’s shape.
Other times I have been flattered by the attention of someone else and allowed them to grow into my space, altering both of us.
Neither case was healthy. It is not possible to carry on this way without feeling stifled. Unfortunately, the move to separate causes injury or brokenness for one if not both.
Supporting one another does not mean losing the traits that make me who I am. Growing alongside and learning from another while still maintaining independence is what makes me stronger and healthier.
I read a quote that said, “Be yourself before you forget who you really are.” That is advice I plan on taking!
“Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life.” Steve Jobs
“Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else.” Judy Garland
Although I couldn’t see anyone, the voices from a nearby changing room could be heard clearly.
It sounded like a mother and child. Mom was engaging her child in cheerful conversation. “Can you count? How old will you be on your birthday?” A happy little voice answered, “Three!”
Moments later the mom said, “Do you need some help?” The answer that quickly followed was, “No, I got dis.”
I chuckled as I thought of young children asserting their independence by wanting to do everything by themselves. Even though they need help, they struggle through on their own. It takes patience to stand by and watch when we know we could make things so much easier for them.
I know that I am still guilty of this type of behaviour. Even when assistance is readily available, I don’t ask for it. Isn’t asking for help a sign of weakness? Actually, it’s more a sign of strength. It takes self-confidence to admit I could use help. In many cases, refusing help denies someone of the pleasure they would receive from assisting me.
God is always ready and willing to help. He shows immeasurable patience to watch me struggle with my independence and not call out to him. He is able to do much more than I could ever hope or imagine on my own. When I truly understand this, I let go of my stubborn pride and call out to him.
His wisdom will guide me through any situation I may encounter. Knowing this, it would be foolish to say, “No thanks, I’ve got this!”
If any of you needs wisdom to know what you should do, you should ask God, and he will give it to you. God is generous to everyone and doesn’t find fault with them. (James 1:5 GWT)